Yes, I *do* still have a blog and yes, I *do* still update it...sometimes...
This is purely for those of you (and you know who you are) who keep reminding me that it's been awhile since I blogged. :P
MLIA. It stands for "My Life Is Average." It's often used in place of a more, shall we say, *explicit* acronym. It can have one of at least two connotations: 1)The user is basically saying "screw it, my life sucks" (without actually using the explicit acronym) or 2)The user is demonstrating how less-than-normal or less-than-ideal circumstances are completely within their personal norm. What does this have to do with today's update? We'll get back to that.
This past year has been a bit crazy. Okay, more than a bit. Back in January, I had a nasty bout of cellulitis in my leg, but on the bright side, it
could have been MRSA, which would have been much, much worse. Plus, I didn't beat around the bush about getting it taken care of so it didn't have a chance to become a big open sore like it could have. A friend of mine contracted cellulitis on his arm a few months later and...well...let's just say he didn't get it taken care of as quickly and it was pretty nasty.
I didn't do terribly well in school, but I didn't do terribly badly either. After much course correction, a couple of customized clusters, and plenty of panic, I finally pulled it all together at the last minute to apply for and successfully earn my Bachelor of Science degree in Art at BYU-Idaho in April. A week later, as a graduation present to myself, the highlight of this past year was a trip to Oakland with my two best friends to see my absolute FAVORITE band, MUSE, live in concert! I still look back and get an emotional high thinking about how amazing that show was and how much fun I had sharing it with my absolute best friends. Mind you, we had TERRIBLE seats and it was STILL the BEST concert I have ever been to and probably ever will. Except, of course, for any future MUSE concert dates that may be in my future. :D
Then, despite some worrying naysay and the extremely frustrating actions of a coworker at the summer job I've worked for three summers now (but only two at the time), I got that job back and started just a few days after the concert. I was warned (very untactfully by the coworker previously mentioned) that it would still only be for as long as the summer help was needed because my dad works there, and we can't have any nepotism, don't you know. Nevermind that *I* worked there
first, THEN my dad got hired, and they rehired me because of my previous experience, NOT because of my dad working there. While I'm going there:
nep·o·tism [nep-uh-tiz-uhm] –
noun: patronage bestowed or favoritism shown
on the basis of family relationship, as in business and politics. I repeat: my being rehired was based on PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE. You can tell I'm still very miffed about the whole situation. Anyway, I did get to work for the summer, and the point is that I
should have been looking for a different job the whole time, knowing it was going to end, and knowing my student loans were quickly approaching their time of becoming due. (That's a completely different rant for another time. Suffice it to say I am VERY grateful for parents who are willing to let me live with them for as long as necessary, and even MORE grateful that the loan companies have things such as deferment due to unemployment.)
As amazingly wonderful as it is to be done with school, BYU-I is still a work in progress; therefore, I didn't get as much education as I really really needed to be able to find a job in my field right away. It doesn't help that when I
started college, the graphic design business was booming. A short 6 years and MANY political and economical mistakes later (I won't name names because that will start big arguments and let's face it...NONE of our most recent political leaders have made very good decisions as of late...) art of ALL kinds is suffering. Sad as it is, art isn't exactly at the top of the "MUST HAVE" list of a nation in economical turmoil and hardship. I am greatly saddened to see my peers in the art world having to settle for significantly less than they are worth, for that is the great compromise. The middle ground between what you're worth and what people can afford is truly frightening.
I thought I had plenty of time to find something in my field. Heck, I thought I had plenty of time to find anything else, too. Two months of unemployment tells me a different story. I have no one to blame but myself, because I really haven't been trying very hard. I have a plethora of excuses but the bottom line is that even after making at least a bit of significant effort in the past two months, the job market flat out sucks. You can bet that the jobs you're applying for are being applied to by HUNDREDS of other people. Even someone like me, with nothing but the best to offer and plenty of past experience and references to prove it, can't seem to fight my way to the top, even WITH previous experience! I can't tell you how many people I know who are working a job they absolutely despise because it's a job and they are very scarce, and that's why I applied to a job I absolutely hate but have worked before and am at least very good at, if nothing else. Yet that was weeks ago and I doubt I'll get hired by them any time soon, despite my previous experience and their willingness and desire to hire me. The fact is there are literally hundreds in line ahead of me.
I'm aware I tooted my own horn a bit up there, but it wasn't
just for the sake of being a braggart. It's simply a demonstration of MLIA in action. EVERYONE is brilliant and EVERYONE is fighting for the same opportunity to prove it. My life is average; no worse or better than anyone else out there who is struggling frustratedly to find that niche where they can live both comfortably and happily. I hope that time is coming for me, and SOON.
In the meantime, I'm determined to try harder and give it my all, and I pray that God will make up the difference. He doesn't try us harder than we can endure, but He definitely pushes us right to the very edge of what we can endure sometimes. I'm not gonna lie; I'm so very stressed and right on the brink of a nervous breakdown constantly these days. Just ask my family how often I just snap for pretty much no reason, to my shame later. I'm lazy, whiny, and selfish, and it's hard to overcome those vices.
Maybe that's the lesson He's been trying to teach me. There's been too much "I, I, I, me, me, me..." and not enough consideration to the fact that MLIA. I am *not* alone in what I'm dealing with, and it's time to suck it up and move forward.
when it rains...
I gotta stop jinxing myself, getting all excited about things finally going my way. :/ Where do I begin...?
Well, for starters, this semester is already off to a pretty rocky start. I got sick right as I was coming back from Christmas break, which meant I missed a couple days of classes right off the bat. Then, right as I was finally feeling back in the groove at the end of last week, I got slammed with a bit of a shocker, really. I started feeling really sick quite suddenly on Saturday evening around 9pm, with a sudden fever and chills that had me literally shuddering and sweating at the same time, unable to even try and sleep it off. A couple of hours later, I realized that my left leg was throbbing and starting to hurt, so I called my roommate in to have a look and see if it might be a spider bite or something. After a little online research, we came to the conclusion that it wasn't a spider bite, but possibly an infection resulting from a bite or sting of *some* kind. I called my mom next, and she gave me several more possibilities - shingles, cellulitis, MRSA, or even an abscess/cyst like my brother had to get cut out of *his* left leg a few years ago. I'm thinking, "wow...none of these is really going to be better than any of the others..."
You know what they say about hindsight being 20/20? I *intended* to get to the doctor the very next day, but I was unable to get a ride and so I figured it could wait until Monday morning first thing. I REALLY should have walked over there myself on Sunday when I still had the ability to do so without much complication.
The area of redness and pain went from two spots on Saturday night in the middle of my shin - one about an inch/inch and a half in diameter, the other about a quarter inch - to a much larger, less uniform spread all the way down to my lower shin on Sunday and Monday, to all the way down past my ankle and around the leg today. It was VERY painful this morning; it actually brought me to tears and I have a fairly high pain tolerance.
So, let's back up a little bit to yesterday, when my aunt took me to the doctor. He took one look at it, felt it and everything, and told me very seriously that we were going to have to pay close attention to it and be very "aggressive" with treatment right away. He speculated on cellulitis right from the get-go, but took a culture of it to be sure. He then ordered me a shot of antibiotic *and* prescribed some antibiotic pills to get going on right away.
I hate shots. I *usually* like surprises, but not the kind that involve shots. So when the nurse came in with the needle and said, "ok, I'm gonna need your bum" I was like "...wait, what?!"
I had a different doctor for the follow-up today, and *he* said it looked like cellulitis for sure, and based on the fact that my fever seems to have gone away, we're on the right track with the treatment. But it felt so horrible this morning and looked worse than before, so he ordered *another* shot to the butt for me today, with yet another scheduled for tomorrow. And, if it's any worse tomorrow than it was today, they'll have to take a blood sample and be sure it isn't more complicated than cellulitis, as if cellulitis isn't complicated enough! I mean, check out this link!
https://health.google.com/health/ref/Cellulitis That pretty much fits me to a T, so what could be even *worse* I wonder?! I was told to take it easy and stay home, off my feet as much as possible, which means no classes for the rest of the week. :/
I've already gotten emails back from some of my teachers telling me to take it easy and not worry too much about catching up until I get back (hopefully) starting Monday, so that makes me feel a little better. If y'all could pray for me, I'd really appreciate that so much too. To be honest, things could be much worse, and I'm grateful that they aren't.
hey hey!
I'm such a flake when it comes to this blog but I manage to update it at least bi-annually so that works, right? :D
I'm really excited about a couple of things right now. First of all, if all goes well, I've applied for graduation this semester! My major is all but completed (all that's left is a travel class or an internship), my generals have been done for a couple of years, the minimum total required credits will be reached after this semester, and I will be submitting two custom clusters in place of a minor. Best case scenario here, and my personal choice, is that they'll approve my clusters, I'll be able to get into the travel class this semester, I'll finish out this semester, and I'll walk in April. Worst case scenario is that they don't like my clusters, they make me take some courses during the summer, I do the travel class in the summer, and I walk in July. Either way, I win because I'm FINALLY graduating this year!
Plus, I wouldn't mind staying for the summer anyway because my friend Craig is coming home from his mission in March! I'm so excited! I've only been on two dates with him, but before he left two Marches ago we had discussed more dating and such, and I've been writing him his entire mission and, quite frankly, I feel like we've grown so much closer even though he's on the other side of the States. I really like him and I'm really looking forward to seeing him when he gets back. :)
I'm taking some difficult classes this semester but I know that as long as I stay focused and get my homework done on time, rather than my usual procrastination, I'll get decent grades and be able to graduate either this semester or next. I'm so excited to be able to say that with absolute certainty now!
Oh and one more thing that I have to say is that I am REALLY proud of myself and my handiwork in watercolor painting. I need to have my family send me pictures of the paintings I recently gave them all, because I barely recognize my own work for how professional they look now in their frames. It really gives me the drive to keep going with it and push myself to new heights so that my work will be worth more monetarily and I'll make a name for myself someday. :)
Tech-knowledge-y
Was trying to be clever with the title. *shrug*
This story is actually sorta old, considering I've had my new phone since, oh...June? July? I don't remember. But I got it about halfway through the summer. I think. Anyway, it's been awhile.
My old phone, a cute little red LG Chocolate, was my favorite toy. The one before that had also been my favorite toy, but unlike *that* one, the Chocolate never gave me any troubles until the very bitter end. I had a LOT of good pictures on it and had been starting to email them to myself when one day it just up and turned itself off (with about 3/4 of a charge still left) and wouldn't turn back on. I tried plugging it in, taking out the battery and putting it back in, and a couple other things I'd been told to try before finally taking it in to the Verizon store for them to take a "professional" look at it. Basically, the end result was that the guy tried everything I did, and nothing worked for him either.
It's like I just can't keep ahead of the technology curve. It's nice that you can transfer all your contacts and pictures and everything from one phone to another when you get a new phone, even when you switch service providers. But the phones have to be ON for the transfer to take place. It just seems so stupid to me that apparently there's NOTHING they can do for me, and even stupider that the phone would just plain stop working like that, with no previous problems or hints that it was dying. UGH.
Don't get me wrong, I love my Samsung Alias2. But I hadn't been planning on a new phone when the LG was working just fine, and losing all of my contacts and pictures really leaves a bad taste in my mouth to this day. Ah well, life goes on.
of illness and such
Sooooo remember that trip to the emergency room a few weeks back? The bill arrived at my home in Bakersfield the other day. Can't say that I was surprised but it still hurts like a knife in the back.
$900. Ow. Nothxplzreturntosenderkthxbai. No but seriously. Ow. Once my mom forwards it to my apartment in Rexburg I'll be taking it to the Student Health Center to see if there's anything they can do, considering I *am* on their insurance plan and it was a random set of circumstances. Otherwise I'll be taking out that student loan I really wasn't wanting to take out after all... T_T
Also, Rexburg did one of its crazy mood swings, going from a little on the "too warm" side two days ago to being more than a little on the "too cold" side and nasty rainy yesterday. That triggered a nasty little head cold starting last night that is quickly getting worse. I was supposed to drive down to Salt Lake for Conference tomorrow, getting to see my dad at the same time since he's going to be there as well, but I just don't see that happening if I keep feeling this bad or worse. Not to mention I'm supposed to be singing at Devotional on Tuesday with the combined Women's and Men's choirs and the Collegiate Singers (I made it into Women's Choir by the way, at least THAT'S happy news :D ), but I'm losing my voice! Le sigh. I suppose we'll have to wait and see what happens but for sure I'm stuck in the R-burg for the weekend. Sad day. :/
EDIT 10/05/2009 : So the insurance kicked in, bringing the final bill down to $134. *PHEW*! Still sucks but better than $900!
Bakersfield ---> Bear River ---> Emergency Room ---> Rexburg...wait, what?
Yes, you read that right. Allow me to start from the beginning.
Four days ago, I was getting ready for my trip from home in Bakersfield, CA to Rexburg, ID via a stop in Bear River, UT. My right eye was perfectly normal before I took my shower that day, but when I got out and finished getting ready I noticed it was very red and irritated and, though I couldn't understand *how* I could have gotten it since no one I knew of had it, I knew it must be pink eye. Being the poor college student I am, and considering my ability to hitch-hike my dad's insurance ran out when I turned 24 this past year, I REALLY didn't want to go to the doctor because I knew it would be more expensive than I felt like dealing with for a stupid pink eye. My mom is a medical transcriptionist and usually has a pretty good idea about how to treat minor things, and she told me to try putting just a tiny bit of Neosporin in the corner of my eye since it has the same antibiotic ingredient as Tobramycin (Tobrex), which is the eyedrops doctors prescribe for pink eye. Mind you, she tells me this just as she and my dad are on their way out the door to begin *their* trip to Peru for 10 days. So I tried the Neosporin trick right then, as well as on Wednesday as I drove 12+ hours to Bear River...which brings me to official adventure #1 of the trip.
I got to about 20 miles from Beaver, UT when all of a sudden the traffic just stopped. After about 15 minutes at complete standstill, sitting in my little '93 Saturn with the broken air conditioner and running out of gas, I turned off my car and got out to at least see if I could see what was going on, and I wasn't the only one. I called some people to see if they could find anything on the internet about what was going on, and eventually my aunt told me to try calling the local information hotline. The recorded message mentioned a traffic wreck that had the freeway completely blocked off (greeeeeat...) and traffic was being rerouted where I had already passed (oh lovely! -_- ) BUT! One lane should be open by now! (Says the operator as traffic continues to stay motionless.) Anyway, about an hour later, after a very long, tedious, and slow crawl across about 2 miles (yeah, 2 miles in an hour...) I finally made it past where they were letting people through on the left *shoulder* one at a time. It had been a pretty nasty wreck involing two big rigs; no injuries, luckily, but whatever both had been carrying had made a HUGE mess across both lanes. With no further delays, I eventually made it to my friend's house in Bear River on Wednesday night. She and I discussed maybe going to the Wal-Mart eye center because it might be cheaper, and I agreed it might be a good idea.
The next morning, while my eye was still very red (probably worse, but I was in denial), it *felt* better, and so I once again passed up a perfectly good opportunity to have it looked at professionally. Instead, I went to my great-aunt's funeral (basically just to represent my dad since I don't really know my great-aunt or her kids at all) as planned. I felt kinda bad because I didn't really cry or anything, but I *did* see some family that I *do* know, some of whom I hadn't seen in at least 10-12 years. It was good to reconnect and I'm glad they were glad that I was there to support them.
When I got back to my friend's for the night, the real adventure started. My eye was bugging me a little, and so even though I knew I should just leave it alone, I rubbed at it and got a little overzealous because, of course, as I rubbed it, it only felt worse. When I opened my eye again, it felt and looked like there was a contact floating around in, and I don't wear them. I pretty much lost it at that point, just knowing that I had just detached my cornea or something. I showed my friend and her husband and they also knew something was very wrong, so, with no other options at 9pm, we rushed to the emergency room, calling my out-of-the-country parents and my aunt in Rexburg whom I'm staying with until I can move into my new apartment to let them know things aren't exactly going as planned. We also called the emergency room to let them know the gist of what was happening so they could get us in as quickly as possible. Being the overly-excitable and emotional person I am, I was seriously freaking out, balling my eyes out, lol. So I said a prayer asking to be calmed, which was answered quite promptly actually. I stopped crying and just kind of sat the rest of the ride out patiently, holding my eye closed.
Now I've never been to the emergency room before. The worst thing I've had to deal with medically was having my wisdom teeth removed, and that only involved a single suture, no swelling, no complications at all. So even though I'm still calm, my brain and heart are going a mile a minute as they take my blood pressure and pulse and ask me all kinds of questions. Plus there's the whole issue of not really knowing if my student insurance will cover me while I'm off track, in an ER, with a provider that's not necessarily on their list and yadda yadda. So when the first nurse says, "hm, your blood pressure is a little high..." Uh. Yeah. Y'think? However, I did start feeling a little stupid when she looked at my eye and asked if I'd been using anything for it, and of course I had to tell her about the whole Neosporin thing. I told her my mom had told me to try it and that it had the same stuff in it as the eyedrops, to which she replied, "yes, but it's not sterile." Oh. I hadn't thought of that... ^^;
Anyway so next I'm lying on the bed in one of their rooms, my friend in the chair next to me still talking to me and keeping me distracted from the situation at hand like the good friend she is. The next nurse comes in and verifies my insurance and personal information, then the doctor comes in, puts some numbing drops in my eye (hate that stuff, especially when it runs into my nasal cavity from the tear duct *shudders* ) and looks at my eye with the typical optometry light where you put your chin on that thing and...yeah you get the idea. By this time whatever was floating in my eye had reattached itself or something but anyway. He told me to lie back as he took a cotton swab to my eye and pulled out some nasty goopy, stringy stuff. Seriously it was weird and gross, and explained why it had looked and felt like a contact was floating around in my eye. He put some dye in my eye and looked at it again to make sure my cornea and everything were intact, asking me specifically if I had put anything in my eye. So again, I had to tell him about the Neosporin, and he mentioned that that probably had been a bad idea and I just might have had an allergic reaction on top of everything else... ^^; He gave me some Tobrex, the nurse came back in and said I was good to go (I took that as a good sign that my student insurance was good), and I left the emergency room with discharge information and medicine in hand. I also called my family to tell them I was going to be just fine.
So there you have it. I basically ended up in the emergency room for a neglected case of pink eye. Needless to say, I feel quite stupid for not just going to the doctor in the first place. I would have had to pay more than if I still was on my dad's insurance, but not nearly as much as I'm sure I'm going to have to pay for the ER visit. At least I got one of those ER bracelets they give you with your name and a barcode on it as a souvenir... ^^;
OK!
Alright so I'm glad I didn't update on the negatives because yesterday made up for all of those nasty little things that had piled up a couple days ago. ^.^
First of all, the weather in Bakersfield for the past couple of days has been absolutely gorgeous and amazing. It worries me ever so slightly to be in the 80's in August in Bakersfield...not that I'm complaining...BUT! When you consider that we were just in the 100's for a week or two solid before this...it worries me, lol.
Anyway, yesterday my family and I went down to Los Angeles, where the weather was even more gorgeous, to go to the Dodgers baseball game. It was "Mormon night," which they've done every year for the past 15, so there were a lot of people there whom we knew and enjoyed the game with. My LDS friends and family will be interested to know that an area 70 authority whose name I don't remember caught the ceremonial first pitch thrown by none other than M. Russell Ballard himself! That in itself was awesome before the game even started! We also were able to get tickets in the right field pavilion, which happens to be where you can get all-you-can-eat Dodger Dogs, nachos, sodas/water, popcorn, and peanuts all night (until they run out, anyway, heh). It was a pretty good game too. Very nail-biting for us Dodgers fans considering the Braves had the first say and stayed 2 points ahead until the bottom of the 9th inning. But then Juan Pierre and Rafael Furcal got on base with no outs, and Andre Ethier knocked one into our right field pavilion for a walk-off home run. It was great!
All I've done today is play video games, but it's ok because it's my day off work and my best friend is over playing video games with me. So great end to my weekend. ^_^
